I KEEP LOSING AT ROCK SCISSORS.
—Anna Jaruga via Facebook
The dog ate my memory cards. —Irfan Darian via Facebook
Honey, pass me the news tile. —@rainreider via Twitter
These leaves would have to do. —@eliporteraltic via Twitter
Christmas morning was never a surprise. —@tony32938627 via Twitter
I wrote it on the fridge. —@apocryphal_x via Twitter
Museum reports theft of toilet paper. —@joostdouma via Twitter
The pen is no longer mightier. —@mdeziel via Twitter
Police say no note was uploaded. —@cwyant via Instagram
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